Blaze-a-thon

Ok, I'm finally going to write about this before I forget. The first weekend of April for as many years as I can remember, my dad participates in the Blaze-a-thon at the Elk's Lodge. It's a BBQ contest for anyone who is willing to pay the entry fee. Friday night is for fun and Saturday is for competition.

From my perspective, it's one big BLD extravaganza!

This is my Daddy's smoker. He built it with my Pop-po (his dad) in the late 90s. I love it and the memories it carries. Plus, it smokes up some mighty tasty BLDs.

And, here's my Daddy. The head chef. He always looks like that when I'm around. I think I confuse him...

This is Robbie, aka my second dad, aka sous chef.

This is my mom. Isn't she adorable? She's the keeper of the peace and the placer of the meat upon the lettuce. It's a very important job.

And...my younger, but not so little, brother. He's the fire watcher and giver of his all mighty (or so he thinks) opinion.

Placing meat upon the lettuce. You know, lettuce is really only good for decorative purposes. Those of you who are eating it thinking it's healthy are being fooled with every bite.

What?! That's not a BLD! That's chicken! What is going on?! ...we interrupt this broadcast to bring you breaking news. Apparently there are wimps in this world who can't handle the pork, the BLD, the bringer of bacon. They think they need chicken. Please provide it and perhaps we will give you a ribbon. If you win. If not, you can feel good about yourselves for placing the blasphemous chicken so neatly upon the lettuce...

Ah, pork ribs. The fourth best thing next to bacon. Y-U-M

They're so sweet and innocent upon their bed of lettuce. And delicious.

Oh. My. Word. Look. At. That. Specimen. Of. Beauty. Pork butt, aka pork shoulder, aka the third best thing next to bacon. YUMM-O

Please don't mind my drool. I just love pork!

And now, I will show you a few of the other smokers I deemed worthy of snapping a picture.

Mmmm, nothing quite like smoked dinosaur for breakfast.

And now, something so completely and utterly rude and crude I will show it to you without commentary because I'm sure you don't need me to point out the obvious...

I'm not going to comment. I swore I wouldn't. I'm just not going to do it.

Oh, who am I kidding???

Who builds an anatomically correct dog smoker complete with balls???

I'll tell you who. Men.

Now that I've gotten that out of my system, I hope I've left you salivating for some scrumptious BLDs, and seriously considering removing lettuce from your diet, but most of all I hope you're wondering just what IS the best thing next to bacon?

And once again, to all of you non meat eating individuals out there, I'm sorry I've subjected you to this awesome display of cooked meat, but I just couldn't help it. I don't understand people who willingly eat lettuce and I never will.